How big are you really?

This one has your new due date of 10/24/2011. That means that's when you'll be arriving in this much colder, less liquidy world. But there will be lots of love out here and people who care about you, so it evens out in the end.



PS You don't like chili or the smell of bread (Daddy says we'll have to work on that, once you get out anyway :P )

I see you!!!

So my little one, the other day-Monday I went to the Dr. with daddy and got to hear some more about what I should and shouldn't eat, ask a few questions and get some morning sickness medicine! So I've been able to take that and we feel great again and that means you get more food! The best part of the visit though was scheduling our ultrasound so we could see you! After we left we went to Mr. Kabobs and had middle eastern food and then to Krispy Cream and then to get my medicine. It was a long afternoon but one well spent.
Then today came the big moment. Ultrasound day! I was worried because whenever I see anyone else ultrasound pictures, I have no idea what I am looking at. But when you were up on that big tv screen you were as clear as day! I could see your head and where your little arms and feet were forming, and the best part of all was that we saw your heart beating! Both daddy and I were mesmerized by you. We were smiling so big and I was almost crying because I was so happy! Then she printed out your picture for us to take home. I think I was probably glowing-I might still be. Then we went to Mr. Kabobs again and then to the public library where I got some books, then to daddy's school's library and he got a book and showed off your picture to his coworkers and we scanned it onto the computer. After that I walked home while dad went to talk to some people at the office (I wanted to walk so I could get some exercise-since I"m supposed to be doing so) and then I read on a bench outside because the sun was shining-reflecting my mood I think :p and dad came home and we went upstairs. Then I finally announced to the world (via facebook) that you were on your way and I put up your picture and the day that you're supposed to be coming out to see us all! So just be ready because from here on out your life will be on the interwebz! Not that you know what the interwebz are yet, but we shall teach you. You'll be our little geek in training! We love you!

Haha no more M&Ms

My tastes for what I can keep down change daily. Makes it pretty hard to plan ahead for when I'm at work or if I'm already at the store. At any rate I get to go to the Dr. a day early, so that's next Monday. I'm pretty excited about that. Hopefully I get some medicine, that would be good.
But what was cool was that I had a dream about you. Well I don't know if it was you you, but you were my baby. I gave birth to you and held you while we slept. I called you Ruthie-probably because that's the last baby I held. My dreams don't mean much but it gave me a sense of happiness that you were my little one. I woke up and thought that you should be there with me. Soon you will be.

Seeing what's what.

Little one I must say. It's been a pretty bad few days. I went to church and couldn't sty because the smell was so strong and it was so loud. It was sensory overload. So Daddy and I went outside and then he went to get the car. During that time a little boy came up to me and ask to sit on the bench next to me. He had a stick he had found and was talking to me about it and he told me his name and that he liked Star Wars. The whole thing just made me really happy. It was like the Lord saying hey it's gonna be alright.
The next three days after were a trial though. I was horribly sick Monday throwing up three times. I did find that I could eat tortilla chips, green tea and M&Ms. But that didn't work for too long because today i was hungry and not hungry. I had to leave work early because I felt pretty bad. Then my boss told me that she's going to limit my hours to like 5 and I have to call to sees if I can come in for more. But after that frustration daddy let me cry in frustration on his shoulder and then got me a Big Mac and then I ate it all down and felt better. But I was still hungry so daddy made me eggs and toast. Unfortunately I realized too late that I shouldn't have eaten so much and it just made me sick again. But I got my self together and we went to a friends house. Matt and Sara Beth. They just had a baby a month and a half ago. So we finally got a chance to meet her. She was precious. She was a bit fussy when I held her-she was kinda hungry. But after she was fed then your daddy held her. It was a really good moment. She feel asleep in his arms and woke up and he was making all kinds of faces and kissing her little hand. All the wonderful things he'll do to you too! It made me feel even better that he's gonna be your daddy. The whole time he was holding her it was like a golden fuzzy frame was around them. I can't wait to see him hold you.
IT was also nice to talk to Matt and Sara Beth because they had a lot of good advice. They also made me feel good that the feelings of frustration I have right now because of the sickness is pretty normal. So while I may not let you read this journal for a long time, I'll let you read it when you have your own children. Because you're not alone. And if you feel frustrated talk to someone who has recently been there. Trust me they'll remember better. Of course they said it's all worth it in the end and I know it is, but in the meantime its good to be understood. This will all work out I know. I wish I could kiss your little face right now but I'll have to wait for awhile. I love you lots!
Love mommy